W.A.T.C.H. and Live Well

As we sail through life, there are certain things we can watch out for in order to smooth out the ride. The acronym W.A.T.C.H. and the words for each letter (Words, Attitude, Temptation, Character and Household) are accredited to Dr. Mike Murdock and they are adapted for this article.

WORDS are powerful. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” (Proverbs 18:21a,KJV). What we say may either build a person up or tear him down. We can use words to thank, encourage, affirm or praise another person for their kindness, thoughtfulness, generosity or forbearance. 

However, by the same tongue we could ride roughshod over other people’s feelings with words that condemn, ridicule, insult or character-assassinate them. Alarmingly, there are horrific real life stories of how tactless and negative words had triggered people to commit suicide.

That said, in some instances, our refrain from speaking or silence in itself could speak more than words. We can do better to improve on how to use words for good and in a manner which is befitting each and every person and situation thereto. Remember, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.” (Proverbs 25:11, KJV)

Be it positive or negative, ATTITUDE could make a world of difference when we face difficulties, challenges or seemingly insurmountable problems in life. As Sir Winston Churchill has said, “Difficulties mastered are opportunities won. Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”

For illustration, we can take a leaf from the proverbial three bricklayers. Asked what he was doing, the first bricklayer said that he was laying bricks under the hot sun. The second bricklayer has a broader perspective and said that he was building a wall. The third bricklayer paused and said, with a twinkle in his eye, that he was constructing a cathedral.

Attitude or the lack of it could stem from whether we can see a desired outcome or goal in spite of our present reality. It has to do with having an enlarged perspective and a greater vision of the future. “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” (Proverbs 29:18a; KJV)

Do not mess with TEMPTATIONS. Flee from them without any second thoughts. A glance at the dictionary would define temptation as “the act of enticement to do wrong, by promise of pleasure or gain”. 

One of the best illustrations of temptation which I can recall vaguely is on how the hunters would entice wild animals with meat wrapped around a blade. As the animal feed on in a frenzy of hunger, they will unwittingly take the bait and succumbed to it.

To have a less troublesome life, it is best to steer clear of temptations and rehearse our counter-approach in advance so that they can kick-in automatically. For example, I like buying books and have more books than I can read. My strategy is to resist the temptation of stopping by bookshops and banish the thoughts of entering another bookshop, at least, until I have cleared my modest line-up of books left unread.  

Not too long ago, there was this ingenious advertisement for MasterCard where it says to the effect that there are some things which money can’t buy; for everything else, there is MasterCard. 

Well, CHARACTER is truly something which money cannot buy. It has been said that while a person can be promoted to a high position, it is his character which enables him to stay at the top.

What is character? According to Hellen Keller, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” 

Character is non-negotiable and sacrosanct for a life well-lived. Ralph Waldo Emerson reckoned that: “Character is higher than intellect. A great soul will be strong to live as well as think.” Higher than the aforesaid, Billy Graham observed that: “When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost.” 

In short, be true to oneself and walk the talk regardless of whether other people are watching or not -- that’s integrity of character in a nutshell.

Apart from ourselves, we need to keep an eye on our HOUSEHOLD which could mean our own family and/or our extended family. The family is the basic building block of society and the health of our nation would depend on the values and lifestyle we impart to our children and how well we keep a lookout for one another in the family.

As it is, the pressures of life can weaken family ties if we do not actively make time for the family. (Believe it or not, computer-addiction have caused some few young parents to neglect their babies.) In addition, a small minority is trying to hoodwink us that there is an alternative to the conventional family structure of one man and one woman.  

By staying emotionally connected in a supportive family environment, we could live a happier life. And, by maintaining and perpetuating the conventional family structure, we would help to stabilize our society rather than mess things up even further.

The aforesaid W.A.T.C.H. is by no means comprehensive. For instance, ‘H’ could also stand for Health. Nevertheless, we can use W.A.T.C.H. as a reminder to use words wisely, keep a great attitude with proper perspective, flee from temptations, uphold the commendable aspects of our character at all costs and take care of our household. Happy sailing! 

P.L.A.N. for Your Success

A goal without any plan is wishful thinking. There is no such thing as an accidental success. One could, for instance, win the lottery without a plan on how to handle it and lose all the winnings in no time. A talent or an opportunity is not a guarantee for success. Deliberate and determined actions are still required in order for us to head towards our goals.

With time as a constraint, it is a necessity for us to PRIORITIZE what we value the most as our goals or desired outcomes (e.g., health, wealth, relationship and self-actualization). And, within each category of goals, we can further list our priorities (e.g., healthy mind, strong bones, etc.) 

How do we know what are our priorities? There is a simple test for this: Ask ourselves what are the first things and the last things that we think about every day -- the things that make us happy (pinky health and Trojan-sized piggy bank filled with gold bars), the things that trouble us (prime candidates for a solution) or clueless (this problem is in a different class of its own)?

Once we know our priorities and the sub-priorities, we can write them out on paper and pen (if still using conventional stationeries) or e-note then on whatever gizmos that can do the trick. We can then review and visualize them every day and then we will really zoom-in and synchronize our life with our distilled priorities at this time and season of our life, subject to future fluctuations and variations. But, at least for the now-moment, we can really, really focus on our known priorities and lead a productive, passionate and purposeful life and out-manoeuvre the ho-hum and humdrum trap of mere-existence without planning.

While it is not always advisable to follow what others are doing, there is much we can LEARN from the insights and successes of other people. As we learn more, we can then discover and assimilate what would work best for us, as well. But, we have to be realistic here so as not to set a goal that is way off. We can, however, set incremental goals that are achievable so that we can come up surely and steadily. For example, we can learn a new language by studying just one word a day via an App, incrementally.

To really get things moving after we have set our priorities and done some research on how to go about achieving our dream goals, we need to take ACTIONS. This is a crucial stage that will really bring us a step closer to our goal -- no matter how distant it may be. If we could keep at it and keep pace consistently, we will advance with growing confidence.

As we journey towards our dreams, we might face some distractions, obstacles, set-backs and challenges. But, as our goals have stayed true with us and would not stray from our minds after having reviewed, visualized and affirmed them daily, we will have to dig-in and stay in the trench and NEVER GIVE UP. Just picture a bulldog with a made-up mind and never, ever give up!

Whose Mirror Are You Looking At?

While a mirror can help us to see ourselves clearly, it can also distort our image, depending on whose mirror we are looking at.

When we keep looking at another person’s life or mirror in the hope of becoming like him or her, we are looking at the mirror of envy, jealousy or covetousness. This is a sure way to Unhappinessville as we compare ourselves with those who are better off than us in areas such as got-the-look and size-of-money-vault. A small percentage of us, I would like to concede, may actually look at the mirror of another person with admiration and be inspired to improve our personal lots in life.

We could be looking at the mirror which family, relatives, friends, study mates and colleagues dish out to us. The tension here is that other people, like it or not, have certain expectations of us even when are we are not public figures like politicians. In general, we like it when they offer sincere compliments or butter us with their subtle flatteries. 

However, we may feel dampened when they critique us or show their disapproval. If the feedback is indeed valid and reveal our character flaws, we could eat humble pies and get some help to become a better person. If the criticism is given out of malice, then the wise thing to do would be to discard it altogether. Sometimes, there is a grain of truth in what they say of us. We could take it with a pinch of salt and keep moving forward in life while evaluating whether we ought to make some adjustments to our behavior and/or value system.

Oh, yes, there are mirrors which the Hidden Persuaders (actually read a book by this name for my General Paper) would love to remind us constantly through mass media. These advertisements infiltrate and keep infiltrating our senses and let loose on how we should look (e.g., ‘Slim is in, Honey’) with a plethora of beauty treatments and update us on the fashion trend for each season. If we let them, they will be pulling the strings of our life, including our purse.

When look into our own mirrors, not all of us like what we see. On the one hand, we need to learn to love ourselves in spite of who we are. If we can’t do it, then we need to find help and we can do this while seating in front of a computer via Google search and YouTube. It will be rather difficult for us to love others and our community if we can’t even love ourselves, to begin with. On the other end of the scale, we could steer clear of narcissism in having too great a love for ourselves and parading like an informed peacock.

Personally, I like to look into the mirror of God’s Word. It says that God is love and He loves us with His everlasting love. We have been fearfully and wonderfully made by Him, and we are God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works. The Word of God also speaks of His plan to prosper us and give us hope and a future.

Who we are is the sum of the mirrors in our life. It is crucial for us to find a fine balance and right view of the person that we wanna become. As you ponder along, may you find fresh inspiration through the following lyrics and song of “Man In The Mirror” by the late Michael Jackson:-

"Man In The Mirror"

I'm Gonna Make A Change,

For Once In My Life

It's Gonna Feel Real Good,

Gonna Make A Difference

Gonna Make It Right . . .

As I, Turn Up The Collar On My

Favourite Winter Coat

This Wind Is Blowin' My Mind

I See The Kids In The Street,

With Not Enough To Eat

Who Am I, To Be Blind?

Pretending Not To See

Their Needs

A Summer's Disregard,

A Broken Bottle Top

And A One Man's Soul

They Follow Each Other On

The Wind Ya' Know

'Cause They Got Nowhere

To Go

That's Why I Want You To

Know

I'm Starting With The Man In

The Mirror

I'm Asking Him To Change

His Ways

And No Message Could Have

Been Any Clearer

If You Wanna Make The World

A Better Place

(If You Wanna Make The

World A Better Place)

Take A Look At Yourself, And

Then Make A Change

(Take A Look At Yourself, And

Then Make A Change)

(Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,

Na Nah)

I've Been A Victim Of A Selfish

Kind Of Love

It's Time That I Realize

That There Are Some With No

Home, Not A Nickel To Loan

Could It Be Really Me,

Pretending That They're Not

Alone?

A Widow Deeply Scarred,

Somebody's Broken Heart

And A Washed-Out Dream

(Washed-Out Dream)

They Follow The Pattern Of

The Wind, Ya' See

Cause They Got No Place

To Be

That's Why I'm Starting With

Me

(Starting With Me!)

I'm Starting With The Man In

The Mirror

(Ooh!)

I'm Asking Him To Change

His Ways

(Ooh!)

And No Message Could Have

Been Any Clearer

If You Wanna Make The World

A Better Place

(If You Wanna Make The

World A Better Place)

Take A Look At Yourself And

Then Make A Change

(Take A Look At Yourself And

Then Make A Change)

What Does Success Mean To You?

There are many possible definitions of success. Success could mean having the resources to do the things that we want. Better still, success could mean having the capability to pursue personal interests apart from the usual obligations and duties, enjoy the finer things in life and live the life we have been dreaming about.

Success is a matter of degree, relativity and diversity. For every level of success, there is a higher level of success to be attained. We can be successful in one area (e.g., business) but not in another area (e.g., family), or we can be successful in many areas but not as much and varied as another person.


Then, there are those whose achievements or contributions are recognized by others and become recipients of accolades, giving them the aura of success. Success then breeds success, and one’s fame becomes a buoy for waves of media coverage over a good stretch of time in the sea of life. 

By the by, other people begin to see you as a success and you become a celebrity of sorts. Such a favourable vibe may indeed serve as a reasonable gauge of your success. That said, one can also be a pure success minus the trappings and remain small in your own eyes without having to blow any trumpets, so to speak.

Here are some rambling on success for your reading pleasure:

“You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” – John C. Maxwell

“To do a common thing uncommonly well brings success.” – Henry John Heinz

“Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.” – Conrad Hilton

“Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.” – Abraham Lincoln

“There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.” – Beverly Sills

“Success is 99 percent failure.” – Sochira Honda

“Success is not perfection; success is slightly above average.”  - anonymous

“Every worthwhile accomplishment has a price tag attached to it. The question is always whether you are willing to pay the price to attain it – in hard work, sacrifice, patience, faith, and endurance.” – John C. Maxwell

“Success is not measured by what a man accomplishes, but by the opposition he has encountered, and the courage with which he has maintained the struggle against overwhelming odds.” – Charles Lindbergh

“Failure is really a matter of conceit. People don’t work hard because, in their conceit, they imagine they’ll succeed without ever making an effort. Most people believe that they’ll wake up some day and find themselves rich. Actually, they’ve got it half right, because eventually they do wake up.” – Thomas Edison

‘There are two types of people who never achieve much in their lifetime. The person who don’t do what he is told, and the person who does no more than he is told.” – Andrew Carnegie

“I long to accomplish a great and noble task; but it is my chief duty and job to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker.” – Helen Keller

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden path, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you lived. This is to have succeed.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

10,000 hours = success 
(According to the 10,000th rule in “Outliers: The Story of Success” by Malcom Gladwell)

Click here to read Q & A With Malcom Gladwell on Outliers: The Story of Success.

Hopefully, the aforesaid ideas and observations of success have given you some inspiration. Now, it’s your turn to define what success means to you. 

Watch Out for Fossil's 'Boyfriend'

What qualities are you looking for in a boyfriend? 

Well, FOSSIL has some pointers for you on the 'Perfect Boyfriend' as per the following window display in a local shopping mall:-

According to one of my favourite preacher, Dr A. R. Bernard, there are three things that woman wants from man, namely, Decisiveness, Consistency and Strength. And, whataya know, there are three things which man struggles in life: Decisiveness, Consistency and Strength.

No harm if you wanna check out Fossil watches or your dream boyfriend using the aforesaid three yardsticks.